I have been asked a number of times lately how I define success. I now realize my answer to that question has changed significantly over the years.

A few decades back I, like many others, may have considered my bank account first, when presented with the question. Do I have the money to do what I want? But success isn’t quantified that easily. While money can reduce financial anxiety and provides a sense of security, I don’t think wealth alone can make us feel successful. There’s simply more to it than that.

The funny thing is we often don’t grasp that we are successful. The Forbes article “Signs you’re being successful even if you don’t realize you are,” points out different ways to look at success.

For example, are you a person who can comfortably stand up and speak with authority? Studies show just 1% of employees feel confident enough to voice their views to others. This is a form of success.

Do you consider yourself happy? The vast majority of people, 90% in one study, believe that success comes from one’s sense of happiness and joy.

And what about your dreams? According to Forbes, “Successful people give themselves permission to dream as big as they want. When you create a vision for your life that might seem wildly ambitious, but you take steps every day towards it, know you are successful.”

And note here that you don’t necessarily have to achieve that dream to be successful. It’s the process of moving towards a goal that makes one a success. As the great Arthur Ashe once said, “Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome.”

And let’s not forget about failure, a frequent companion to those who are successful. Getting to the top of any mountain requires trial and error. Those who are successful pick themselves up after a disappointment, learn from their mistakes, and start climbing again. Thomas Edison famously admitted that he failed more than one thousand times while trying to invent the lightbulb. On failure in general he was quoted as saying, “I have not failed 10,000 times—I’ve successfully found 10,000 ways it will not work.”

Clearly, success comes in many forms. Some find it in the meaningful work they do. That means a job we look forward to. Not every day, perhaps, but maybe 85% of the time. And when I say job, I don’t mean only in the traditional sense. Of course, tending to one’s family would fall under the job umbrella. As would dedicated volunteer work. Success then might be attained by the contributions we make that impact our family and community.

The more I think about it, the more I realize success is personal. There is no one-size-fits-all. I suppose the ultimate test will come at the end of our lives. Can we look back and say, “Yes! I’m proud of what I did.” I do know that for me the answer will be simple. Success is dying with few regrets and good stories.

I’m working on it.

Your Forgotten Sons

Inspired by a true story

Anne Montgomery

Bud Richardville is inducted into the Army as the United States prepares for the invasion of Europe in 1943. A chance comment has Bud assigned to a Graves Registration Company, where his unit is tasked with locating, identifying, and burying the dead. Bud ships out, leaving behind his new wife, Lorraine, a mysterious woman who has stolen his heart but whose secretive nature and shadowy past leave many unanswered questions. When Bud and his men hit the beach at Normandy, they are immediately thrust into the horrors of what working in a graves unit entails. Bud is beaten down by the gruesome demands of his job and losses in his personal life, but then he meets Eva, an optimistic soul who despite the war can see a positive future. Will Eva’s love be enough to save him?